Know Who Your Friends Are
It’s something you really don’t think about when you move, but it is almost critical to any existence when you don’t have family nearby. I wanted to touch on this subject as it has opened my eyes since moving here on what the meaning has become to me.
When I had my Mom living so close to us, I never gave a second thought to who I was going to write down as the emergency contact at school, who would be there for my kids if something happened to Craig or I, or if I needed something at all, she would never hesitate to help. I knew that once we moved to FL, that that would all go away. The dependency I had invested in her would now have to be in someone else, and that was a scary thing for us to think about.
This blog itself was the first step for connecting us with those who lived in the Orlando area- a stepping stone for friendships. But what the Facebook brochure doesn’t tell you is that as much time and effort that you may be putting into the “friendships,” are you getting the same in return? Are you looking for a return at all? We all put our best foot forward online because we want to be shed in the best light possible- sometimes no one is interested in our pitfalls and bad days because we know how it feels to be in them ourselves. But here is the problem, how well do you really know your online friends? I thought we knew ours VERY well, but when faced with the ins and outs of daily life with those who were only a FB status before, it became apparent that we had nothing in common after all.
Where am I going with this? It’s simple, when you have just moved somewhere new, and exciting, and at the same time, oh so scary, you need someone outside your family to be able to rely on. Someone who you can call when your car breaks down, when your kids need a ride at school, or someone you just need to vent too about how the relocation is going. It is an important role to not only find in someone, but to be for someone else. It is a crucial component that is key to making a smooth transition, just as much as having what makes your home a home. Don’t sacrifice your comfort level in any area of your life without knowing what the cost will be to do so. Having the most wonderful place to live in isn’t as fun if you don’t have the company to share it with.
I have loved social media, but only to a point. I feel like the days of “Hi, my name is Amy” have been replaced with strangers “poking” me and reading conversations on Twitter that I feel aren’t my business to be reading in the first place. I think we all feel we “know” each other, but I will always stick by the fact that we really don’t know each other at all until we are face to face and spending time together. I have made some incredible friends through the blog and through Facebook, but I have also been hurt in the same fashion. Because of the blog, I am more in the Disney public eye, and it gets frustrating to figure out who is there for me, and who isn’t. I have to say that sometimes I regret ever writing any of it, only because opening up your life to the world invites in everyone with a judgment call to make.
Getting back to my point, make friends that will help your relocation a celebration and not a frustration. If friendships you made aren’t what you need in your daily life, don’t be afraid to make new ones. Life is too short to waste on those who aren’t bringing anything positive to your life, and trust me, it takes a lot of courage to admit it. I know that the friends who have truly been there for me are the ones that make me smile with every email and phone call. I hope I have been a good friend to others and that someone out there sees my picture and thinks “She is a good friend.” I am learning as I live here, and I hope I have helped someone out there in this area of life.